351 – How to Work Hard and Feel Great about Your Life with La’Vista Jones

Gift biz unwrapped episode 351,

Reconnecting with the things that bring you joy attentive.

Gifters bakers,

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Your gift biz here is your host gift biz gal,

Sue moon Heights.

the kids came home for Christmas and now have gone back

to Colorado for their new year's festivities.

And another round of family arrived on our doorstep a couple

of days ago.

That's what the holidays are all about,

right? Friends and family.

And I love it.

We decided to have a nice,

cozy new year celebration at home this year,

hanging out in the kitchen,

cooking a special meal,

and then relaxing by the fireplace,

anticipating the countdown.

Then as midnight drew near,

of course the noisemakers and hats came out along with the

bubbly. Now I know I'm painting the perfect picture here and

that there are many people dealing with all sorts of health,

financial and relationship challenges,

and the holidays only accentuate that if that's you,

I want you to know.

I recognize and I see you.

And although I consider myself very blessed,

my perfect picture has its own blemishes.

I can't think of one person in my life who can

say that everything is the best it could possibly ever be,

nor can we ever,

I just choose not to highlight or focus on the hard

and disappointing things unless they're relevant to a topic we're discussing

here. It's not that I'm covering them up.

It's just where I choose to focus my energy on the

positive things.

So they shine brighter than the others.

If you're struggling with something in your life,

I hope you find that this podcast and my coordinating community

gift biz breeze to be a welcoming,

supportive, and inclusive place to help you navigate your way.

And with that,

as we look forward into the new year,

I searched for a guest who could bring us a message

on how to be better and advocate for ourselves as my

husband would say,

be your own best friend.

So today's talk is about the future,

including specific actions you can take to support and show love

to yourself because you deserve it.

You'll hear ways to be happier and bring more joy to

your days.

If you will now,

doesn't that sound exciting and something to look forward to Happy

new year,

2022, and welcome to the first episode of the podcast for

the year.

I have the perfect guest for you.

It's Lavista Jones.

Lavista is the founder and CEO of 31 marketplace.

An agency that helps overworked solo preneurs,

do what they love without sacrificing themselves and experiencing burnout.

She accomplishes this by blending systemization and self care topics that

she and her guest speaker candidly about on her podcast.

Boss, talk as the burned out survivor herself,

Lavista is leading a movement of entrepreneurs who want more from

life than frazzled days and sleepless nights,

her unique approach to blending strategy implementation and holding space for

a moment to breathe helps each client cultivate their own culture

of work life balance.

We need you so badly.

Welcome to the gift biz on wrapped podcasts.

Oh, I am so excited to be here.

Thank you for having me.

I am,

like I said before,

so thrilled that you're here,

you know,

a new year brings this anticipation of the ability and the

opportunity to do things differently.

And that's the conversation that I'm looking forward to getting into

with you today.

But before we do,

I have to do something because some traditions don't go away

with the new year is our motivational candle.

So if you were to shed a little more light on

who you are share with us,

what a motivational candle of yours would look like.

Awesome. Yes,

I definitely will get into that and happy new year to

everyone who is listening.

So my candle would be housed in this teal Aqua colored

glass container would definitely have a wooden stick,

kind of a wick in the candle from an aroma standpoint

would have hints of lavender.

And Teakwood because I find both of those very relaxing and

would also contain dried flowers,

the type that have those at the very top of the

candle, because I like a little extra and pretty much everything.

And so that includes my candles as well.

So from an appearance in kind of smell kind of standpoint,

that's what that would be for me.

I can smell it and feel it and visualize it already.

So do you have a quote or some type of saying

on the candle?

Yes. I would want it to say reignite and take a

moment to breathe And tell me what that means.

Well, for me,

it's actually a self care ritual that I just incorporate into

my day-to-day when I'm running my business,

I burn what I call my work candle.

And so at the top of my Workday,

I light the candle.

And so then while it is burning,

I am doing my work.

And when my day ends,

I ritually blow that candle out and I walk away from

my office and I walk away from the work and I

leave it there until I come back the next morning.

And so what that message would be for me is to

just reignite the passion that I have for the work that

I do,

but starting it with like just settling myself,

taking a moment to breathe,

focusing on just making sure that I'm okay first and then

actually serving those that I serve in the marketplace.

So doing a self check for yourself first,

just like how they say on the airlines with the oxygen

masks, you've got to put yours on first,

before you can help anybody else.

You have to be filled up to be able to offer

and serve your audience regardless of whoever that is.

Yep. Absolutely.

So Lavista,

do you really have a candle in your workspace?

Like real physical candle?

Oh, absolutely.

Everyday. Oh my gosh.

I love you.

I am so all about candles and I do that also.

I can't do it in my office.

That's outside of my house because of fire code restrictions.

But when I'm working at home,

you better believe I have those candles going,

but I'm going to think about that a little bit now,

like have a work candle mentality when I was hearing what

you were talking about,

gives us distinct marker in time when you're stopping your day,

when you blow out that work candle,

right. It's kind of like closing the door to your office

or driving home,

whatever it would be,

but so do candles then for you always link to work

or when you go into the kitchen or the living room,

can you light other candles?

Yeah, I have candles throughout the house.

I have candles in my bathroom downstairs in the kitchen and

our living room just to kind of set the atmosphere for

those particular rooms,

the mood that I'm trying to set.

I just find the one that I dub,

like my work handle.

It's one that just kind of helps me kind of set

the tone for my Workday.

I do work from home.

So my office is at home and my husband is also

an entrepreneur works from home and we have a young son

he was doing virtual learning,

which was quite interesting.

And so then I've been doing it for a while though,

but it's just one of those ways to just kind of

signify that for this space.

This is where I work.

This is the start of my day and this is how

I ended.

Right. And so it's even one of those signals for my

family that when they come in and that candle is lit,

like my focus is on work.

And then when that candle,

you know,

I blow that out.

Like I am wife,

I am mom.

Like they know that my focus is on them because I've

been able to focus on what it is I need to

do in the marketplace.

And now I'm able to focus on being with them and

being present with them.

So it's just the physical ritual that I just do in

the office,

but I have candles everywhere.

Well, I'm glad about that.

Cause I would be really sad if you couldn't have candles

except for work.

So that's good.

I also liked the idea of the symbolism there.

You know,

it's a mental state,

obviously too,

you know,

blowing that one out.

So you're done,

you're kind of closing the book on the day,

but then also just for everyone else to know,

if that candles lit,

mama's still working,

I gotta be quiet and respectful for a short time longer.

I like that.

Do you use symbols like that throughout your business and what

you teach?

I don't know if they're all quite that tactical,

but you know,

I do try to help my clients infuse,

like their day-to-day with simple things like that to incorporate their

self-care. I know for me,

I like candles.

Like I like the way that they make me feel.

I like the smell.

I like the sound of like hearing that fire crackle right.

Of like the WIC.

So it's just kind of everything about them was kind of

sets like a mood for me and just kind of makes

me happy.

And so it's that little spark of joy that just having

a candle around me creates,

it was like,

of course I needed to incorporate that into like my work

day so that I'm bringing that joy into my work.

And so it's things like that,

that I try to help my clients focus on like,

okay, what is it that you like,

what is it that brings you joy?

How do we actually bake that into the systems that we're

creating for you?

So that this business that you're creating actually nurtures you instead

of is one that is draining of you and your energy.

Yeah. We all need that.

And again,

this is why I wanted to bring you onto the show

this particular day,

a day of celebration.

So that's why I wanted to do more of the lighthearted

candle talk to calm.

We all probably had a really fun crazy night last night.

So now we're just going to ease into this new year

and set the stage for a really fabulous,

great, productive,

happy, and self-empowering year.

Share with me how you decided that this would be the

focus of your work.

Where did this all begin?

Well, I would have to say it started,

I think with my own burnout experience.

So I often refer to my time in corporate is like

my other lifetime.

Cause it does seem like a lifetime ago when I resigned

from my career that I had in corporate America.

And when I talk about it,

it's one of those things like,

Hey, when you think about a relationship,

it was complicated because I loved the work that I did.

I really enjoyed my job.

But in hindsight,

I realized that I had a lot of lack of boundaries

in that position.

Especially around my time,

the job required me to do a lot of travel.

So being away from my husband,

we didn't have our son at the time.

And he would joke because I would be gone so much

that my salary was like my spousal support.

Cause he would only see me on the weekends and it's

like, okay,

yeah, this is spousal support for you being gone all the

time. And so it's like,

okay, you know,

I can remember us having a family vacation.

He and I in Maui for a week and literally flying

back in to Phoenix that morning and going back to our

home, me unpacking,

doing a little laundry repacking and having him take me right

back to the airport so I could fly to Atlanta for

work the next morning.

And so it was like,

that was just kind of the pace that I kept in

that position.

And I ignored those whispers that my body was giving me

like, Hey,

you're tired.

You need to rest.

You need to eat,

you need to do these things.

And then eventually like that cosmic two by four,

just kind of smacked me.

It was like,

okay, we're done.

And I found myself actually having like in the midst of

like a panic attack,

like on the 2 0 2 driving into the office,

because like I said,

I have ignored all of these other signs,

like having like this headache that wouldn't go away,

feeling super tired all the time and couldn't get rested,

starting to feel emotional when I would get feedback from my

boss, not malicious feedback,

just like,

Hey, we need to change this in the presentation.

And I would go outside and like bawl crying and would

even be thinking to myself that Tom Hanks movie,

I'm like,

there's no crying in baseball.

And I was like,

what is wrong with you?

Like, why are you getting so upset by this?

And so it's like,

things just kind of escalated because I was ignoring all of

those signs that my body was telling me.

And so when I finally decided to resign from that position

and go back into the marketplace,

working with private clients,

I recognize a lot of clients I was working with had

a lot of those same behaviors that I had in corporate

staying up and working until three,

four o'clock in the morning,

sometimes pulling all-nighters being available whenever somebody wanted to get on

their calendar.

A lot of those things that were boundary issues for me,

I was seeing in the marketplace among entrepreneurs that I was

working with and it was like,

oh, okay.

Like I know from personal experience that if they continue working

at this pace,

that they're on like a one way journey to burn out.

And it was like,

I couldn't stand by and continue to watch other people take

that path.

And so it's like,

all right,

let's work on not only making your business efficient,

but let's also work on how you're going to take care

of yourself while you're doing it.

Because I do firmly believe that each of us has the

capacity to not only fulfill our vision in the marketplace,

but take care of us as visionary as well.

And so that,

I think my own experience of that burnout is what really

led me to doing the work that I do.

Now. Would you say,

Say that women have a higher propensity to suffering from this

because we always feel like we need to help a be

there assist any time.

You know,

I don't have the stats to back it up,

but intuitively I would say yes,

I feel like we have the tendency to feel like we

need to do all of the things.

And it's like,

well, no,

no, no,

no, I'm fine.

I don't need help.

I can do what I can do.

Right. And we just kind of take on and take on

and give and give and give.

And I think that's in any role that we're in,

right. Motherhood being a wife partner,

whatever the case may be.

And I think that also carries over into what you do

in the business,

because I think that most of us are coming from a

place of service and wanting to serve our clients.

And it's like,

we just give and give and give and we just get

further and further and further down on that priority list.

And we don't always necessarily take great care of ourselves.

Yeah, it's so true.

And what we think is a strong position.

So we're going to be better,

greater, more successful is actually the reverse.

I mean,

I've suffered from it myself.

And even in the past,

I'll say I'm staying at the office till six o'clock cause

I need to get this project done.

And now I've started learning,

you know what,

Sue, if you're going round and round in circles with this

stop, and then the next morning I'll come in and I

can do it in like five minutes,

it's over because I've refreshed myself.

But identifying those places where you need to stop or you

need refueling or you're no longer being effective is sometimes hard

to identify.

Yes. But so I think this is a great place to

go with this conversation because we want to set everybody up

for this year,

you know,

different types of things that we can be doing better,

I guess.

And I hesitate to say better,

but different in a better way for us in terms of

being able to achieve more potentially in less time,

but with better results and then also taking care of ourselves

too. So does it make sense for us to talk about

these two buckets separately?

So being efficient and then also self-care would you make those

separate or should we talk about them together?

I think that we can do either.

I think it's easier to kind of wrap your mind around

the concepts sometimes when they're talked about separately.

And then I think that when you have the separate conversations,

then maybe you can start making those bridges to how those

two things intersect and are married to each other.

If that makes sense.

Okay, let's do it.

So I would like to start with self care because as

we've just been talking,

if you aren't in a good position to show up for

yourself and your business,

any systems or anything you have in place,

isn't going to work because you're just too exhausted to even

go through them properly.

I'm thinking,

so let's talk about self care.

If we have a propensity already to want to please everybody,

and a lot of listeners have full-time jobs.

So it's not just our own requirements,

but it's people who are employing us,

you know,

different people have different situations,

but how do you start tackling this?

I think the first place is to make sure that,

you know,

your own definition of self care.

I think that if we get our definition from other places,

like, you know,

looking on social media,

it's just like,

oh, my self care has to look this way.

And I think then that just adds to like the guilt

and like the negative self-talk that we have,

because it's like,

oh, I'm clearly not doing self-care correctly because I'm not doing

it like this.

So I think that that's where we all have to start

with. What does self-care actually mean for me and doing that

self reflection,

you might be sitting there thinking like,

I don't know.

I have no idea what self-care looks like for me.

And so then I would say it's reconnecting with the things

that bring you joy.

So I typically take clients through the exercise of thinking about

the things that like make you happy.

And it might be things that you haven't done in a

long time,

because as we get older and we develop significant relationships and

we have more things that are pulling for our time,

like jobs and community ministries,

like all of those things,

we start losing little pieces of ourselves along the way and

things that like,

just make us happy.

Maybe you really like crosswords,

but you haven't picked up a crossword to do that in

like a decade,

right? Maybe you are big into puzzles.

Maybe you really enjoy walking and feeling the sunshine on your

skin. Like all of those things are self care simply because

they bring sparks of joy into your life.

And so it's like,

once you define like what self care looks like for you

then it's what are those things that bring me joy and

how do I get more of it into just my every

single day.

Right? Because your self care,

it's not something that is on a to-do list for you

to check off like,

okay, I did this,

I took care of myself.

Self-care done.

And you like move on to the next thing,

like, okay,

newsletter done.

It really is more about how do you infuse it and

make it your lifestyle.

So Luby stuff.

Is it a combination more or less of things that you

do and then how they make you feel?

So it's not that self care.

Like one of the things I've tried a million times over

and over again is meditation because everyone tells me how good

it is for you,

et cetera,

et cetera.

I can't do it.

So to myself and like,

Sue, you're not taking care of yourself,

you're not meditating.

But then when I even try,

it's like,

why am I doing this?

I hate this.

It's so frustrating.

And so even though the doing might be on a good

self-care list,

the fueling for me isn't there.

So I should just not bother with that until I decide

at some point to try it again,

if I ever did.

Right. So it's the two things together.

Yeah, absolutely.

And I think that,

that goes back to defining it for yourself.

Right? Like I remember having a client and we were talking

about her self care and she was doing regular massages.

I think she was going to get a massage was like

every three weeks.

And so we were kind of talking about that and we

were also talking about like her love languages and like how

she's just naturally wired right in that way.

And so I'd like for my clients,

look at their self care through that lens of their love

languages. And one of the things we realized was like,

her physical touch was like on a two out of like

a scale.

I think of like a one to 12,

she was like a two on physical touch.

Meaning she doesn't like people touching her.

And so then it was like,

okay, there's a disconnect here.

Like, so why are you going and getting massages?

And she was like,

because that's what self care is.

And it's like the who told you that?

Yeah. Massages are great for me.

Like, I love a massage,

but if you don't like people touching you that can't be

your definition of self care.

Like she hated them.

And so when she would get out of the massage appointment,

she would actually feel worse than she did when she went

in. Because the whole time she's there she's tense because she's

got this stranger,

who's touching her.

And so it was like,

okay, that's not on your sock.

Careless. Like,

what does self-care mean to you?

And we found out she really liked to paint.

And so instead of doing massages,

she would take the time to like,

okay, I'm going to take a break from this in my

day and go set up my easel and put some paint

on canvas.

And it was totally a game changer for her because that

was something that brought her unique joy.

This makes so much sense.

So there is no list that you should be going to

that say,

this is self-care,

this is self Karen,

go through and pick the ones it is.

It all has to do with what brings you joy?

I mean,

it sounds so simple,

but I don't think we give ourselves permission to do those

things. You had mentioned puzzles.

I love puzzles.

Like I asked my family this year for a huge,

big, really nice puzzle.

Not big size-wise necessarily,

but big cost-wise because it's those really fun wooden puzzles with,

anyway, I'm getting off on a tangent,

but you know,

at first I might,

why would I do that?

Like, I'm not 10 years old,

but I love them.

They make me happy.

So that's self-care then That is self care.

I think in its simplest purest form.

I think that when we adhere to like,

okay, self-care has to be a 90 minute massage and like

a full day at a spa.

Like for some people that is what it is.

But for others,

it's just like,

yeah, I don't want to be touched.

I don't want to be sitting in like,

I hate taking baths.

Like I don't want a bubble bath.

And if that's like the prescription,

right. That's out there.

It's like,

well, I suck at self-care because I don't do that because

I don't enjoy them.

And it's like,

all right,

like what do you enjoy?

What does light your fire?

What does bring you joy?

I think that lists are okay if you're looking for ideas,

right? Like,

I don't know what I like to do.

Well, try it right where you brought up the idea of

meditation, you've tried.

It, it doesn't seem to really fit with you.

Like you don't seem to resonate with it.

And it's like,

okay, I've tried it.

And I,

now I know like that's not for me.

And so then it's like,

well maybe there's something else on one of these lists that

I have found that will spark that joy in my life.

So I think that lists have their place,

but I don't think that you're going to find like a

cookie cutter approach just from a list of like you find

on Pinterest,

like, oh,

here it is.

These are my things.

This is what I'm going to do because you're an individual

and it's gotta be something that just like lights you up.

You were like,

Hey, I like puzzles,

but I'm not 10.

Why should I be doing this?

Because it makes you happy.

Right. And I think,

you know what you're saying?

And this is perfect is our own definition.

And it has to make us feel good.

And there's no judgment about whatever that is.

You don't even have to tell anybody what else you're doing

for self care,

whatever that is for you.

It's fake if you're doing it because everyone else is telling

you, you should do it.

And you're not getting that emotional growth or rejuvenation from it,

but it has to be pure or it's not even worth

doing in the first place.

So you're giving us permission to find whatever makes us happy.

That's legal,

you know,

any of those things,

right. And no judgment on what it is.

It's only for you.

So I think that's freeing right there.

This is a great start to the Year for yourself in

the new year.

Yes. Okay.

So I've got a few things now that fit the category.

I have some activities.

What happens next with self care?

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Do it.

You have to be consistent with doing it.

I am a firm believer that your self care,

it doesn't have to be complicated or expensive,

but it's got to be intentional.

And so it's like,

that's where the lifestyle starts to come in.

How do you incorporate that into your day today?

How do you do more of the puzzles?

Like do you intentionally take 15 minute break in the morning

and go sit at the table and put a few pieces

together? Is that how you break during the day?

If it is walking,

maybe when you take lunch,

even if you're in corporate,

right. Working for somebody else,

if you enjoy like being out in the sunshine makes you

happy, go for a walk under lunch,

or go sit outside,

go eat your lunch outside,

get in that sun,

put your feet in the grass.

I guarantee you,

it will be a game changer for you.

And you'll feel so much better when you go back to

doing what you were doing before.

So it really is defining it,

understanding those things that bring you the joy and then how

do you incorporate it?

How do you get more of that in your life and

be intentional about doing it?

Yeah. Make a space in your life to do it,

or it just won't ever get done.

Exactly. So what do we do if let's go to puzzles

and this is not my case,

so I'm not going to say it,

but it,

but since we're talking puzzles,

what if that's something that someone likes to do and their

husband's like,

that is the stupidest thing.

Why are you doing that?

We need the laundry done.

Why are you doing puzzles?

You know,

I think that it's a conversation it's definitely needed.

Right? I would hope that the people that you're surrounded by

support you recharging yourself and taking care of yourself and maybe

they just don't understand that that's what that is.

Right. And so just helping to kind of reframe what that

activity or what that ritual is,

what it actually means to you,

what it's doing for you,

how it's making you feel better.

Because I think that if those around you understand the why

a little bit better,

I think that the support might come as well.

And it's like,

oh, okay.

Like, yeah,

the laundry will be there.

Right? But my wife needs this 15 minutes to work on

her jigsaw puzzle.

And by doing so she's actually going to show up as

a better wife or as a better spouse or life partner

or parent or business owner,

like all of the above,

because her battery has been able to be recharged.

So I think that if that is the feedback,

then I think it warrants having a conversation like,

Hey, this is why I'm doing this.

This is how it makes me feel supported.

This is how it makes me feel better because people seem

to get on board a little bit better when they understand

the why behind something We're not asking for acceptance,

we're providing an explanation is I think the way I'm receiving

what you're saying,

because I could see a whole bunch of us after this

conversation going out and doing some things and incorporating them in

to our home with family,

viewing it,

being like his mom going crazy,

no world is she doing?

Or if someone does like going to get massages,

but never has allowed herself to do that now saying,

you know what?

Yeah, this is for me.

And this is a form of self care.

And I am going to spend some money doing this,

but we're not looking for approval.

We're looking to explain why this is important.

And then what the value is,

if someone's questioning again to the fact that we're always people

pleasers, it's a generalization,

but I'm going to say it that way,

that there might need to be a conversation.

So people understand what you're doing because we're looking at having

you change so that you have a more solid,

strong, healthy,

effective life for this year.

So those changes might be noticed.

And you don't back off.

If someone asks a question about it,

you explain why you're doing what you're doing.

Exactly. Yes.

Okay. Love that.

Anything else in the self care category that we should cover?

I think that if you're doing those things,

I think that you are on a really good path to

taking care of yourself in a way that is unique to

you in a way that you can be consistent so that

you are replenishing yourself on just a daily,

ongoing basis.

And I'm also thinking some of this might change over time,

too. What you're enjoying doing right now,

you might switch it out by season or just when the

mood strikes you to do something differently.

But the point is to fit something like this into your

life, as you can.

And I'm even thinking like when I'm at home,

this is just so crazy,

but I just get such joy out of a fresh mug

of coffee and lighting my candle when I sit down and

start working at my desk.

And so I feel like that self care,

because for absolutely no reason,

I just feel so good about it.

Yeah. And I would agree with you than it is.

And I think that the key for that is acknowledging it

and celebrating it.

Right. Because I think that we have such grandiose ideas about

what self-care has to be,

what it's supposed to be.

Okay. Like my self care has got to be like this

two week vacation to Greece and you know what,

Hey, if it's on the budget and you want to go

to Greece,

go, but think about it though.

That's like a one time they cation.

Like that's probably not going to sustain you for an entire

year, but sitting down for a few minutes,

lighting a candle and drinking a cup of coffee out of

your favorite mud.

That's something you do every day.

Like you're literally pouring joy into your own soul every day

by doing those things.

Ooh, that's a great one.

That's a quote for you,

Libby sta I love that.

Okay, beautiful.

So we've had a great conversation about self care.

I want everybody listening to really think through what that is

for you and start integrating it into your day if you

aren't already.

And if you are taking a little bit of time to

recognize and celebrate that for yourself and not just for today,

but as we move on throughout the year,

and by doing these things,

I'm thinking lovey stud,

that we are going to show up as our best self.

When we get into our workspace and start serving our customers,

Confident that anybody who is doing that on a regular consistent

basis will most definitely show up better for themselves,

their family and the,

And stay healthy and all of that.

But we still have the issue that we have a lot

of work to do during the day.

And especially as handmade creators,

a major percentage of the people who are listening are the

makers too.

So you've got that added layer of selling,

making business owner.

If you're a solopreneur,

you're shipping your marketing,

like all the things.

So how do we bring that into a more efficient system

as we're looking at improving what we're doing throughout our life

for this year?

I guess one of the things that I would share is

just trying to automate things as much as possible.

So I know that there are things that are just going

to be associated with.

Like, I need to actually literally put my hands on this

to create this,

to do this,

to send this out.

And you know,

those things that has to happen in order for your business

to fulfill the orders and continue to support your clients.

But I would say that if there's anything within those processes

that doesn't actually required you to manually do something or take

care of it yourself,

try to leverage automation as a teammate,

as much as possible to make the systems in your business

as efficient as they can be.

Yeah. I'm thinking of a couple of things that could work

for our community here.

And that is email service provider,

where you can automate some of your emails,

like a new customer who comes on.

You don't have to be the one writing about how do

you like your order?

Did everything arrive?

Okay, whatever those types of emails are,

that is a system.

For Sure.

Absolutely. There's another system which is shipping takes a little bit

of tech work,

but this is totally achievable.

I don't want anyone to not think about doing this,

but having a system like ShipStation or shipping,

easy, where when people order from you online,

their information is already in the system.

So you're not having to re-type addresses or anything with the

order other than pulling the product,

packing it up,

clicking and fulfilling an order.

So those are just two examples of ways that you can

put systems into your overall day work.

And I would add,

especially for the makers that are listening,

like for offboarding or clan,

right? Like,

Hey, they have ordered this,

I've created it.

I've sent it out there,

even tools out there.

One that comes to mind is a tool called handwritten that

will connect to your CRM.

So like,

that's where your client's information is like their name and things

like that.

That if you are accustomed to sending out handwritten thank you's

or things like that,

or you want to incorporate that.

And you're like,

I don't even have time to do the stuff that I'm

doing. Let alone send somebody a note,

thanking them for shopping with me or supporting my boutique or

whatever the case may be.

That kind of stuff can be sent out automatically.

Right? Like if you kind of have a general idea of

what a note would be,

you set up the infrastructure between like your CRM and like

that tool in particular handwritten and those letters go out automatically.

So Lavista,

you're not even going to believe this,

but I know you're in Arizona.

I visited David at handwritten just a couple months ago.

And he's been on the podcast.

Yes. I love Kendrick.

I went out to his location,

saw all the printers.

And have you been out there?

I have.

It's amazing.

So the next time you talk to him,

tell him,

Sue says,

hi, I will.

But yeah,

we were out there.

We did a whole demo.

I did some lives,

like I said,

he's been on the show just back.

I want to say it was about end of July sometime,

but that is amazing.

That is such a fun business.

I love it.

It's so funny that you brought that up.

It's such a time saver in such a personal touch to

any business,

even though like my business is service space,

right? Like I'm not making anything for a client,

but that's still a personal touch that I like to add,

but it's automated and it's consistent.

And so it's like every single client that I work with

is going to get this from me and it's repetitive,

but it's not something that I have to manually do every

single time.

Right. I'm thinking of other things within our days that we

can do.

And one of the things that comes to mind is not

all of it can always be automated,

but you don't have to remember how to do things from

scratch each time,

either. I'm thinking about when I do blog posts or even

this podcast.

So it would be different for different people.

But when you have a process that you do over and

over again,

instead of having to remember each step,

write it down.

So you have a structure that you can follow because that's

a lot less brain power than remembering,

oh, I've got to check SEO,

oh, I've got to do this.

Like all those different types of things.

It could even be maybe to be even more relevant to

our listeners when you're adding a new product to your website,

what are those steps that you need to go through?

Well, you take photos and you're seeing that photos with this

filter or at this time of day is the best or

whatever it is and all your different steps.

Then you don't have to use the brain power to remember

all of that.

You just follow what you've put together.

You know,

so that's being efficient,

right? Absolutely documentation in any business is your best friend.

And it will help you scale that business because when it's

time for you to start building team and bringing people on

to maybe take on some of those roles,

they'll know how to do it because everything is documented and

it cuts down on your training time.

There'll be able to just kind of come in from day

one and follow the process that you already have laid out

and documented.

And it's like,

okay, I do this,

this, this,

and this,

and it's done.

Love it.

Excellent tip.

Anything else we should talk about with processes and being efficient,

I guess,

to maybe close the bridge,

right? From what the self care into the systems I spoke

earlier about kind of looking at your self care through your

lens of like your love language,

your love languages.

So that's work that is that's out there.

You can go to like leveling,

which is.com

and figure out like what your love languages,

if you don't already know,

and it's figuring out how to incorporate some of those things

like into your system.

So an example for that might be again,

like with your offboarding,

we already talked about like,

okay, here's what you can automate sending out thank yous that

maybe you're really high on words of affirmation rate.

And so in your physical space,

maybe you surround your office or your workspace with quotes or

things that motivate you.

But what about the business that you're running?

And so part of your offboarding,

if words of affirmation is really high for you,

make sure that you automate collecting testimonials or feedback from your

clients, because what that's going to be,

it's going to be like these little love notes that you

are asking for from every client that you work with or

every person that makes an order with your business.

And that's going to be something that's going to bring you

joy, right?

Because you're already wired to feel a certain kind of way

when you're affirmed with words.

So why not have your business send those to you on

a regular basis?

Because how often do we ask for feedback?

If it's not like an automatic thing,

like you forget,

you get busy and it's like,

oh, I sent that two weeks ago.

Is it too late for me to ask for feedback or

a testimonial automated,

have a system behind it,

collect that information.

And not only is it great for your business,

you've got increased social proof that you can use out for

your marketing,

but it's one of those things that you're doing it in

a way that's building a business that nurtures you because it's

bringing you joy to get that feedback coming in.

That is a fabulous way to think about this because continuing

with your example,

you know,

asking for reviews or referrals is a best practice anyway.

But if it also helps you reinforces why you're in the

business and what you're doing and why you put in the

work and all of that,

because it aligned so well with what you need with your

love languages.

I've never thought about it that way before.

I love that.

And you know,

we, haven't really talked about love language.

There may be some people here who don't really understand what

that's all about.

So let's cover that for a minute.

So there are five of them and it really is the

idea of like the way that you are wired to receive

and to give love in a lot of the context of

those conversations is often in like a romantic kind of way,

like, oh,

knowing your spouse's love language.

So if they are a physical touch person,

maybe you know that they're going to want some more snuggles,

you know,

on the couch with you,

because like,

that's how they're wired to receive love or vice versa.

If you are,

again, words of affirmation,

like hearing your spouse,

tell you that you are great,

and that you're a great spouse in,

you know,

tell you things that are affirming to you,

then that's going to make you feel loved from your spouse,

my approach,

and taking that research in that way of looking at your

love languages focused internally,

right? Like,

so, okay.

If I know what my love language is,

how do I do things in my life and my business

that actually speak those things to me,

which is why,

you know,

I use the example of words of affirmation for testimonials,

you know,

getting a testimonial from somebody that you have helped,

or you have created something for and knowing how much they

enjoyed it,

or loved giving it as a gift,

or just really appreciate it,

your craftsmanship,

like that's gonna make you feel good.

And so that is more of how you leverage that love

language in to how you're building your business to make you

feel good when you are doing the day-to-day stuff.

Yeah. And you know,

we're talking love languages and business,

but you also mentioned personal.

I think telling people that what they've done really made you

happy, even if it's your husband taking out the garbage or

your child cleaning up the room or your child being very

polite and saying,

thank you to someone that they don't know,

just demonstrating good behavior.

That makes you feel good.

You should tell them because it reinforces that behavior to them,

which in turn makes you feel good.

It's kind of a little circle there.

Is there a book about love languages?

I think There is.

And it's actually called the five love languages.

There you go.

I've heard of it before.

I don't think I've ever read it,

but I think I'm going to now the five love languages.

Is there like a test in there or do you just

kind of zero in on what they are?

Or how does that work?

There is a test in the book itself,

but I think that if you go out to the five

love languages.com,

I think there's an assessment.

You can just take online.

Maybe if,

you know,

10 years ago you were like,

okay, my love language was primarily words of affirmation and physical

touch. It may have changed now from like the last time

you really kind of thought about it.

So there's an assessment that's out there that you can take

to learn more about what love language your most dominant in

your spouse can take it.

Your children can take it.

If you have a team,

your team can take it,

right. Because how good is it to be like a boss?

And knowing that you have a couple of teammates that are

words of affirmation or gifts is like their core leveling,

which, and like,

that's how you can like purposely talk to them,

right? Telling them that they've done a good job,

like, you know,

somebody that is words of affirmation,

giving them a thank you card or saying,

Hey, well,

if you said did a really great job on this project,

or you did a really great job getting this mass order

out and getting it out quickly,

and the client was happy.

Like that's going to light them up and like,

make them feel appreciated being part of your team.

If you've got a teammate that maybe really likes gifts,

like gifts is their dominant love language.

It doesn't have to be like anything super fancy,

maybe, you know,

their favorite coffee,

places, Starbucks.

And it's like,

Hey, you know what?

I saw you really working hard for this project that we

were doing.

I just wanted to give you this gift card to just

show you how thankful I am and appreciative that you're part

of the team.

Like they're going to think that you were the best boss

and slice bread.

Right? Absolutely.

And that not everything has to cost money either.

You know,

it just depends.

But the other thing that I was thinking as you were

talking is it's gotta be their love language.

It can't be your love language thinking they're going to appreciate

it as much as you,

you would appreciate it.

Right. So,

yeah, I mean,

my assistant,

I'm not good.

This is something that I need to be better at.

But in the summer we have a fabulous farmer's market and

I'm usually at the office before the farmer's market opens.

And so I don't ever really go and I'm so angry

with myself for not doing it.

So this is a perfect example.

I need to fit that in next summer for sure,

to be good to myself,

but she will pick up tomatoes when she sees really good

tomatoes, she'll bring them in and she'll bring them a couple.

And she's like,

this is for you and Michael tonight for dinner,

I just saw them thought of you and I'll bring them

in. And then that was so sweet,

right? Like she's buying a million tomatoes.

She gives us two.

It's just nice.

It's just those little personal touches.

And it also,

I mean,

we all can feel it.

And there is science behind this that when you give,

there is some reward chemically in your body,

just for the act of giving,

just being generous.

Like that comes back to you too.

So just had to throw that in there.

Cause I was thinking about it.

So this is fabulous.

I just feel like what we've talked about here with identifying

love languages,

how to define what that means for you and then acknowledging

how you feel and integrating that into your day.

And then along with easing some of the work that we

have by creating systems or documenting one or the other can

be a way to set us up to have a different

work-life in 20,

22 more fulfilling life overall,

and just set us up really well,

to be happy,

fulfilled, energized,

and not burnt out.

Yes, yes.

And yes.

Okay. What would you add to that or also say to

inspire us to actually do it because you know how it

is, you know,

if you're a podcast listener,

you probably listened to several podcasts,

you get off,

there's so much information and sometimes we never act.

So I need some words of inspiration from you for Everybody.

Yeah. I would say,

you know,

incorporating all of the things that we've talked about,

right? Systemization in the self care into your business and into

just your day to day life.

I guess the,

the biggest takeaway from that would be to give yourself grace

along that process,

right? You're not going to come out the gate being perfect

at all of the stuff like,

oh, I'm going to implement 14 new systems tomorrow.

Like that's probably not going to happen,

but give yourself grace and celebrate the progress that you're making

towards these things.

If you know that there are a few systems that you

need to put in place,

some automation need to put in place,

some documentation of things that you need to put in place.

Also, you know,

making sure that you're being consistent with taking care of yourself,

it's progress,

not perfection.

It's going to be an ongoing journey as your business evolves.

As you evolve,

celebrate the progress that you're making and just keep going,

give yourself grace throughout.

I love that.

Where can people go and learn more about ullevi sta Keep

it as simple as possible?

Well, you can find me really anywhere at Lavista to Jones.

So my website is fluffy SAA jones.com

on social media platforms.

You can find me as Levisa Jones as well.

Beautiful. Perfect.

Oh my gosh.

This has been absolutely fabulous.

Thank you so much for your insight.

I feel so good.

I mean,

I already am thinking of a couple of things that I'm

going to integrate in for this next year as well.

Your advice is so spot on.

It makes me feel light and excited about what's ahead.

We've got a whole new year with whole new opportunity.

Yes, absolutely.

Lavista here is 2 20 22 for you,

me and all of our listeners.

Yes. Happy new year,

Cheers to a new year with a focus on caring for

ourselves. So we're in a better position to also serve others.

January is a big month here at gift biz unwrapped.

I'll be talking about why starting this Wednesday in my tips

and talks show.

So make sure to watch for that.

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Got a really fun post in there.

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